My Heart Aches

Time for a quick post. Today was the epitome of heartbreak. The Chief had a good morning but during his trip to Palm City Presbyterian he began to fatigue. The emotional and physical toll of church and seeing his many year friend Mary Cochrane really triggered a lapse into feeling sorry for himself and depression. He shared with Pearl, Sally and me his growing frustration of being killed with kindness. He wants so much to do the things he was once able to do without thinking. Now, it is a chore to just ambulate anywhere. His legs are beginning to fail. Watching him try to move his left leg is agonizing. There is definitely a failure in sending signals from his brain to his left leg. The damn apendage just won't respond and he stands still...forever. You want to help, but you can't. You want to reach out and carry him, but I can't lift 175 pounds safely. I'm not sure what to do. Other than pray that the Lord's will be done, a day at a time. Grant me the strength to deal with the hurt. And the patience to not get frustrated and irritable. I trust in Thee to get us all through this storm safely. Amen. Out. Ricky